Update: My children are hurting. My son had a grand Mal seizure this past year and this is caused by stress, emotional and physical. My eldest daughter graduated from law school and is harassing her only sister by emails and Facebook. I have no doubt she is being coerced into doing so by her adopted father. He has brainwashed her for decades. I have done everything I can to alert their family who actually care, as well as, the community.

My youngest daughter is working hard with a team of professionals to get the help she needs. All she wants to do is heal and go back to school. How can anyone deny her this? Even though her father avoided prison by marrying a woman who could pay off his creditors and debt from insurance fraud…which is a FELONY...to the tune of $5 million, he doesn’t think he needs to financially help his own blood daughter.

I understand he has received an award from his high school De La Salle in New Orleans. I suspect “purchased” is a more appropriate verb. Frankly, I expect better from the Lasallian brothers.

Her father has destroyed her family of origin, traumatized his children and owes them for the rest of his goddamn life!!!

My attorney has candidly advised me, if any harm comes from my children being mistreated, I can go to court.

 

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE BY PROXY IS NOT MOVED ON!  March 28, 2018

The media facade put forth by the ex is he. has. “MOVED ON”.  Not so when my children are still receiving, from his hand, Domestic Violence by Proxy.

This is the pivotal reason for showing the Domestic Violence in my first marriage from the previous post. As the abuser, he continues to NOT allow my children contact with me, their mother, without severe consequences which impedes them from independently moving forward in their young adult lives. And well they know it, because if they did, my eldest daughter would be fired from her job at his law firm and my son would be kicked out of the house his step-mother owns and demands he pay rent. Money he could be saving to start a life on his own.

But that is not their father’s goal. His goal is to hold my two children mentally, emotionally and physically hostage and to torture my youngest daughter at every turn.

“Everyone is entitled to their own opinion but not their own facts.” – Daniel Moynihan

Here are Domestic Violence by Proxy facts which prove he has NOT MOVED ON:

1.) FACT: He kicked his youngest and only blood daughter out of the house the same day she contacted me, her mother.

2.) FACT: He took his youngest and only blood daughter’s car away the same day she contacted me, her mother.

3.) FACT: His youngest and only blood daughter continues to be in my life (note: the above photo from her birthday last month) and he withdrew her financial support for college last summer while she lived with me, her mother.

4.) FACT: He continues to ambush and attempts to sabotage relationships while his youngest daughter is trying to move forward in her life. We have evidence.

Based on what has actually taken place, we can use deductive reasoning for the following:

5.) If his son came to see me, he would take away his car, just like his sister.

6.) If his son came to see me, they would kick him out of the house, just like his sister.

7.) If my first born daughter came to see me, her mother, he would fire her from her job at the law firm. Frankly, I’d be more proud of her if she were making an honest living doing anything else, even flipping burgers, rather than working at a law firm with known corruption and fraud.

Their father has NEVER “MOVED ON”. But wouldn’t it be nice if he did.

As long as my children continue to be subjected to this kind of abuse, I will be right here beating the drum.

This is a photo of the bruising inflicted on me by my ex husband. I write about the episode and include this photo in my book F.I.F.I., Financial Infidelity F**k It, which was released in December 2014. In the book, all pictures are in black and white. For the first time, I have released the color photo taken by me with my iPhone. Color makes it real. At the time, I had learned my husband of nearly 20 years had been using my identity to commit numerous financial crimes. I was looking for evidence, he caught me and tried to wrestle the car keys out of my hand. I was pinned to the Escalade holding the keys and phone to my chest and he was on top of me, kicking and jabbing me. My phone rang and it was someone who knew I was in trouble. It was the only thing that made him back off.  I also write about an earlier incident during our marriage when he leveled a blow to the top of my head. We were married just a few months.

In the years that followed our divorce, he has admitted to committing  acts of insurance fraud which has not only involved the forgery and notarizing of my signature but several others and took place at his law office. I show one particular legal document and the individuals involved in a previous blog post here, on this website.

My ex is a practicing attorney in Metairie and has a weekly radio show on WWL giving legal advice to the community.

 

I’ve written many times here about my family’s Northshore megachurch, Christ in a King Cake. Prior to reuniting with my youngest daughter, I made the statement frequently, I didn’t really care whether people attended this church or not, just don’t give them your money.

My position has changed and here’s why.

Now I’ve heard the horror stories of my daughter recounting the times she was told, “you can never reconcile with your mother”, while pastors and church staff were praying over her and laying hands on her as a fourteen year old girl. Extra security guards were hired so I could not attend my two children’s graduation from a christian high school, which is affiliated with said megachurch. In addition, I suspect my daughter’s activities were monitored. Case in point, my daughter was given a credit card and told to go buy what she needed for her freshman year at LSU. No one came with her. She found herself at Bed, Bath and Beyond in tears not knowing what to buy and feeling a panic attack. Heartbreaking. Suddenly, my sister, a pastor, shows up, sees the state my daughter is in, says hi and then leaves. I suspect she was checking to make sure I was not shopping with my daughter.

This is a megachurch which likes to put in their advertising for their children’s ministry and school, “where your child is safe.”  I suspect this an attempt to set themselves apart from the Catholic Church’s child abuse scandal. My youngest daughter was not safe from their spiritual abuse. To review, spiritual abuse’s impact is immense. It is like God showing up and giving His approval for all that is happening.

That my friends is uniquely spiritual abuse.

At least catholic parishioners  have recourse to report abuses to the archdiocese and even the Vatican. Non-denomination megachurches go unchecked and unchallenged with no such ruling body.

Just to connect the dots, cults have no such oversight either.

I suspect members enjoy the megachurch music and pretty lights, putting on tiaras and unicorn sparkles for special events.  I can no longer say I don’t care if people attend events and service. It has destroyed my family and I nearly lost my daughter forever to suicide.

I care because I suspect it can destroy other families as well.

If you have similar suspicions and need representation, please contact me: jodiparmley@yahoo.com

 

“You must not be timid. One day life will demand it of you.” ~ Woman in Gold. (following quotes included, with paraphrasing)

It was not enough to rob me of my family and destroy it. No, I had to be eradicated. But you will not come to my funeral. Instead you will watch me celebrate my life!

I can never return. I had to flee. I will never forgive them for making me flee and preventing my children from being with me. At the very least we should be reunited and rightfully so.

I am proud of my contributions, my book, and I am proud of my children. No one can take that away from me. In my book I am also speaking for the ones who didn’t make it.

“Freedom of speech means you can say whatever you want. What you can’t do is lie and then expect not to be held accountable for it.”

I seriously doubt my attorney would have contributed a chapter if it was a book of lies. “Not all opinions are equal. Somethings happen just like we say they do.”

I’m eternally grateful for many things today. First and foremost, for the survival and return of my youngest daughter. Only God!

I’m grateful for my husband Jack and his family for their love and support.

I’m also grateful for the help and support of many people in this community who became loyal friends to me and my daughter. Please keep us in your prayers. I can’t imagine how difficult it will be for my daughter to navigate through life with so much disillusionment and abuse…mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual abuse. Knowing the people she should have been able to trust…aunts, uncles, father, sisters, step family, school, church…let her down in catastrophic ways.

Her family supports suspected criminal(s).

They are a conman’s shield, i.e. any person or entity a conman uses to appear legit. I suspect their pictures on Facebook reflect the evidence.

How does my daughter reconcile this fact? How does she choose a good mate? good friends? good actions?

Her family protects suspected criminal(s).

They do not have a leg to stand on. They find the word “fuck” offensive but suspected criminal behavior is apparently okay. No right to criticize. No right to point a finger. Hypocrite is too nice a word.

Judases.

My ex likes to say I gave him power of attorney. Never have I executed power of attorney with anyone. My forged signature is not even his handwriting. Apparently, I suspect, someone else did his dirty work. The sample I saw looks like the round bubble handwriting of a young woman.

The fact that my eldest daughter has worked at her adoptive father’s law firm since high school terrifies me. I have literally told her to “get the fuck out of there.” I suspect her desperate motivation to discredit me is a matter of survival. I can forgive her for anything. I will love her and be here for her forever. I believe she is predestined and born for greatness.

I suspect there is more than one person committing criminal activity and this is tragic. I suspect this person could turn certain people in and even plea bargain for a lighter sentence. Lets end this tragedy right here, right now!

Think about it.

 

The movie Woman in Gold inspired me to write this post. I am of the belief that evil never changes its strategy. No matter if it is destroying a country where Jews must flee the Nazis or if it is destroying a family where a mother must flee an abuser.

This document is a matter of public record. In addition to the suspected forged signatures, these individuals were planning to build a school and other municipal projects on BOTH sides of the lake. Two of the attorneys involved have a weekend radio show on WWL giving legal advice to the community.

This is a settlement that calls out suspected criminal activity on page 6 (shown). The named insurance company was able to work out a deal to obtain their money.

This document reveals the most egregious act against me by my ex. Holding me responsible for nearly $2,000,000. My attorney was able to prove my signature was forged and is separate from these proceedings.

I, myself, and another party named as an individual indemnitor, filed two separate formal complaints last year, to the Louisiana Bar about this mater, stating that our forged signatures were notarized. To date, no disciplinary action has been taken.

You can view the entire document by clicking the Facebook link on the Home page.

My daughter came back to me Mother’s Day week! 

It has been four years since I was able to wrap my arms around her. I don’t know how we carried the pain of separation.

What I do know is everything I have read about deprograming is true. As soon as she left the influencing power, by going away to university, the process of deprograming began. Literally, the brain begins to see one truth. That one truth breaks through and from there all the lies unravel.

What was that one truth?

Her dad and step-mother began a campaign of character assassination, performing multiple blood and urine tests on my daughter for drugs, which were clean. My daughter told me her uncle, who is pastor of a local mega-church, recommended the drug testing be done. They used coercion to make her sign forms and contracts.

She is an honor student!!

The step-sister locked her out of the condo my daughter was forced to share. Suddenly, my daughter woke up one morning with the thought, “OMG, this is how my mom felt!”  She flipped her father the virtual middle finger and told him, “You can keep your money!”

Her dad froze her account and took away her car. For an entire month she began sleeping from bedpost to bedpost with .53 cents in her purse, long boarding to classes across LSU campus and completing her exams, all the while dealing with horrible anxiety. Jesus!!!! Who puts their beautiful 20 year old daughter in physical, mental and emotional jeopardy like this???

This is abuse. Anything could have happened to her!!! 

I’m glad I stayed close by.

Had I moved out of state, I would not be in the position to help my daughter. Upon calling me, we met. After work, my daughter went back to her step-mother’s house, a place she has called home for four years. Keep in mind “Tani” (as I refer to her in my book), the step-mother, is a “family law specialist” who last month paid $6000 to be on the cover of a small town coffee house rag. She and Dug like to sit in the front row of their mega-church every weekend. Christ in a kingcake.

My daughter proceeded to tell Tani she talked to me and the step-mother kicked my daughter out of her house. My husband and I literally went to pick up my daughter sitting at the end of Tani’s driveway surrounded by bags. Her face was in so much pain. At the same time, what she was doing was so amazingly brave.

By this time Dug, her father, was home. He told her she was financially cut off.

Heartless.

Recently, my daughter gave me her high school graduation mementos. I was blocked from attending the ceremony last year by a local mega church I call Six Flags Over Jesus in my book. The same pastor/brother-in-law hired extra security to keep me off the grounds. How christian of them.

My daughter continues to feel happier everyday! She sleeps well and says the anxiety is gone. Looking to the future, we want to educate the public on what alienation looks like from every angle.

This will be the best Mother’s Day ever!!!!

 

 

 

“Why did it take so long?”

A question many will ask in the future when cases of church abuse have been counted and assessed. After viewing the Academy Award winning movie Spotlight, I felt I had witnessed first hand the power of church influence over a community, a city, and a parish. Although I grew up Catholic and saw much of what was reenacted in the movie, the brainwashing and control seemed to leap from the screen. What are we doing?

Personally, I will always believe in God because I am a spiritual person who has faith that there is a grand design and Designer in our midst. The gravitational pull of Harry Potter, magic and vampires compels us to accept the fascination human beings have for the spiritual realm because we are, in fact, made for the supernatural.

“People will always want their gurus.” –Escape by Paul Morantz

Perhaps the above statement is true. I have read in great detail all of Mr. Morantz’s experiences, legal battles and threats to his well being and I have to agree. He battled numerous cults on the West Coast in 1970’s including Synanon and Scientology and is considered the foremost legal expert in the country on cults and brainwashing.

For me, however, it is no less baffling. Not only do people want their gurus, the 1st Amendment of the United States gives them protection under the law and the church’s tax exempt status gives them more money.

You know what they said in Boston during the child abuse crisis by priests? “Oh but they do so much good! We can’t throw away a pastor over a few bad apples. Join the party!” – Spotlight. There were thousands of survivors but only a hand full in the support group S.N.A.P. ( Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests) and only 130 had come forward and spoke to Boston Globe reporters.  That is until the dam broke above the fold of the Boston Globe newspaper on the Epiphany in 2002.

Right now the Northshore is home to a mega-church I refer to in my book as Six Flags Over Jesus church. It happens to be owned and led by family members. The pastor is my brother-in-law who is married to one of my sisters. My nieces and nephews grew up in that church. They all live in a big sprawling house in a well known subdivision I like to call in my book, Nuevo Riche. My two younger children began attending SFOJ church a little over five years ago.

During my divorce, the pastor and my sister shunned me from family gatherings and holidays where my ex and children were invited. My sister doesn’t hesitate to pose with my children in photos. I suspect she has pathologically taken my place.

Further,I suspect he pastor and his wife have elevated my ex in the church by assigning him a leadership position for prayer groups. If I could tell you the details of what people have witnessed from my ex of late, you would shake your head in disbelief. The over riding comment, “His behavior is not based in reality.”

My children have not been allowed to visit me in four years.

I suspect the pastor and his wife have given their ringing endorsement for parental alienation by condoning, cooperating and celebrating the ongoing abuse of my children while I have been erased from their lives as their mother.  What kind of impact does this carry?

It is immense. It is like God showing up and saying, “God doesn’t like your mother either.”

That my friends is uniquely spiritual abuse.

It is the argument Paul Morantz used in winning his precedent setting cases against cult leaders in California who were protected under the same First Amendment as churches. I have a case. I suspect the people of St. Tammany may protect their churches and are afraid to speak against them. Our silence is complicit and damning.

“If it takes a village to raise a child, it takes a village to abuse them.”-Spotlight.

I believe more people will come forward. Some have already talked to me after learning of my book and told me their stories. I promise you, we are not alone.

Do you have similar suspicions?

jodiparmley@yahoo.com

 

The title quote is from the book Escape by Paul Morantz. 

Father’s Day 2016 was marked by a picture on social media of my children with people who measured me for my coffin long before my book was released. While I fought for survival,(emotionally, spiritually, and physically) having everything but my integrity and soul ripped away, my family banded together in a united front against me.

Why? Because evidently my ex was born without a conscience and I could not be bought by his money. Everyone in my family loves his money. They can have it.

I stand for integrity and the truth.

The group picture, posted Father’s Day weekend, includes my children with their step-mother and step-sister, my sister the pastor’s wife and my step-mother. My step-mother took our inheritance sometime after 2010, when my father was diagnosed with cancer. He was ill, did not want treatment and needed my step-mother to take care of him. How convenient for her.

When I talked to the attorney about dad’s will, after his death, the attorney was very candid and I’m sure well aware of what my step-mother accomplished in three short years before my father died. Our conversation went as follows:

Attorney: “Your step-mother has everything.”

Me: “Oh well, I guess that’s that.” (laughing)

Attorney: “But if she dies in 30 days, it’s all yours and your sisters.”

Me: LOLLLLL

Attorney: “I’m not kidding.”

You may be wondering, what is my family fighting for?  I’ll tell you. Their social standing!

That’s right, now that they have their money all squirreled away in bank accounts, especially the tax-exempt church accounts, nothing is more important to these greedy mother fuckers than their social standing.

Interesting observation; I’m not sure why my ex is not in the photo. It actually looks like a picture one would take of a gathering on Mother’s Day. Weird.

How is one man, who forged their Mother’s signature during twenty years of marriage on multiple legal, insurance and financial documents, committed multiple counts of perjury in Family Court (happens everyday with impunity), multiple counts of insurance fraud (felonies), who abusively keeps his children alienated from their Mother, and who destroyed a family, worthy of honor on Father’s Day?

The answer is, he isn’t. Moreover, he is not worthy of practicing law.

 

To be continued.

 

(Disclosure: Although my kids are now young adults, they are still living under their step-mother’s roof and are just trying to survive. My first born still depends on my ex for her livelihood and post-graduate education. Their father is an unconscionable human being who likes to appear devout by leading prayer groups at my brother-in-law’s church. My children’s father has put each one under enormous stress disguised as love in exchange for their unquestioned loyalty. To understand more about cults and brainwashing, I recommend Paul Morantz book, “Escape”)

The above quote is from the movie,“The Best of Men”, viewed on Netflix.

“Indeed, it makes our role more important when the legal system so often fails the vulnerable as they face off against the powerful.” – Ronan Farrow

The following essay, by Ronan Farrow, appeared today. I have followed his family’s struggles since the advent of his mother’s book in the 1990’s. “What Falls Away” written by Mia Farrow. Abuse comes in many forms, not all leaving obvious marks, but the manipulation and control has a definitive pattern.

Substitute fear for love and call it caring.  

I never imagined my own children would be subjected to the same grooming techniques all predators use against their targets. Please click on the link below and read his accurate account.

My Father, Woody Allen, and the Danger of Questions Unasked (Guest Column) – Hollywood Reporter