“Why did it take so long?”

A question many will ask in the future when cases of church abuse have been counted and assessed. After viewing the Academy Award winning movie Spotlight, I felt I had witnessed first hand the power of church influence over a community, a city, and a parish. Although I grew up Catholic and saw much of what was reenacted in the movie, the brainwashing and control seemed to leap from the screen. What are we doing?

Personally, I will always believe in God because I am a spiritual person who has faith that there is a grand design and Designer in our midst. The gravitational pull of Harry Potter, magic and vampires compels us to accept the fascination human beings have for the spiritual realm because we are, in fact, made for the supernatural.

“People will always want their gurus.” –Escape by Paul Morantz

Perhaps the above statement is true. I have read in great detail all of Mr. Morantz’s experiences, legal battles and threats to his well being and I have to agree. He battled numerous cults on the West Coast in 1970’s including Synanon and Scientology and is considered the foremost legal expert in the country on cults and brainwashing.

For me, however, it is no less baffling. Not only do people want their gurus, the 1st Amendment of the United States gives them protection under the law and the church’s tax exempt status gives them more money.

You know what they said in Boston during the child abuse crisis by priests? “Oh but they do so much good! We can’t throw away a pastor over a few bad apples. Join the party!” – Spotlight. There were thousands of survivors but only a hand full in the support group S.N.A.P. ( Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests) and only 130 had come forward and spoke to Boston Globe reporters.  That is until the dam broke above the fold of the Boston Globe newspaper on the Epiphany in 2002.

Right now the Northshore is home to a mega-church I refer to in my book as Six Flags Over Jesus church. It happens to be owned and led by family members. The pastor is my brother-in-law who is married to one of my sisters. My nieces and nephews grew up in that church. They all live in a big sprawling house in a well known subdivision I like to call in my book, Nuevo Riche. My two younger children began attending SFOJ church a little over five years ago.

During my divorce, the pastor and my sister shunned me from family gatherings and holidays where my ex and children were invited. My sister doesn’t hesitate to pose with my children in photos. I suspect she has pathologically taken my place.

Further,I suspect he pastor and his wife have elevated my ex in the church by assigning him a leadership position for prayer groups. If I could tell you the details of what people have witnessed from my ex of late, you would shake your head in disbelief. The over riding comment, “His behavior is not based in reality.”

My children have not been allowed to visit me in four years.

I suspect the pastor and his wife have given their ringing endorsement for parental alienation by condoning, cooperating and celebrating the ongoing abuse of my children while I have been erased from their lives as their mother.  What kind of impact does this carry?

It is immense. It is like God showing up and saying, “God doesn’t like your mother either.”

That my friends is uniquely spiritual abuse.

It is the argument Paul Morantz used in winning his precedent setting cases against cult leaders in California who were protected under the same First Amendment as churches. I have a case. I suspect the people of St. Tammany may protect their churches and are afraid to speak against them. Our silence is complicit and damning.

“If it takes a village to raise a child, it takes a village to abuse them.”-Spotlight.

I believe more people will come forward. Some have already talked to me after learning of my book and told me their stories. I promise you, we are not alone.

Do you have similar suspicions?

jodiparmley@yahoo.com

The title quote is from the book Escape by Paul Morantz.